Create A Life That Feels Good On The Inside

psychotherapy-create-a-life

I often tell clients thinking about yourself first is important. You are important and you matter. Your feelings matter, your voice matters, your life matters. Always. Most women that show up in my office start their statements with “I’m always the one whose there for others when they need me” , “I give alot it’s just who I am” or “everything’s getting too much with the kids, husband, work. I’m finding it hard to cope” or “I can’t put a finger on why I feel anxious or depressed, nothing really happened”. Of course it’s hard to cope when you endlessly give energy to things and people outside of yourself.

Self appreciation, self reflection and self realisation are all part of self care. Running on an empathy tank is bound to lead to a breakdown on a physical, psychological and emotional level.
Have you ever wondered about why we as women end up in the “givers” role? Why is it that we are constantly expected to get up, show up and be there for others even when the going gets tough for us. Why is it that we don’t allow ourselves the freedom to show vulnerability? Why is that that we fear vulnerability equals failure? Why is it that we are scared to face up to our own shadow?

Sometimes we are so busy engaging in the lives of others that we forget that there is a home inside all of us. A home that requires just as much nurturing, care and love as we give to others. A place where we come to feel safe, secure, centered and at peace. Just as we want to feel in a home outside of us that we create for our safety and security. Regularly giving yourself some space to reflect, reassess and reconsider your emotional state at any given moment allows you to process your mountain of emotions before it gets too much. Engaging in a daily meditation or yoga practice or other forms of mental as well as physical exercise allows you to maintain a sense of equilibrium on the inside. The benefits of such practices are well documented and research suggests that in order to alleviate emotional pain you need to move the mind and body.

Today stop, pause and reflect. Give yourself the opportunity to feel. Allow yourself the space to know what feels good on the inside rather than what looks good on the outside.

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